House of Consent

House of Consent is an informative and educational media that offers exclusive content on violence, sexuality and consent and the ways in which these three modes of interaction coexist or coexist.

Info section
The Info section offers feature articles with original angles on topics related to violence, sexuality and consent.

These articles provide a basis for reflection on these themes.

Guide section
The Guide section proposes to put into practice the topics covered in the Info section and to work together on these issues. This accompaniment aims to try to live a sexuality and a life without violence. We do not position ourselves as coaches or therapists, but share our experiences and queries as victims and specialists in these issues, and offer an exclusive and benevolent point of view.

We are a queer white woman * and a heterosexual black man. We have always positioned ourselves closer to our values ​​even if it would put us in difficulty within our respective "groups". Each of us is discriminated against in one place, in his daily life. And it is from this place that we will address you. To become, one must first be, we are House of Consent.

House of Consent (HOC) is a space that aims to inform about sexuality, consent, violence and the links that can exist between these three forms of interactions. HOC offers to accompany you through various stages to enable you to fully live your sexuality.

After working for years on the issues of consent, violence and sexuality in workshops, groups of words, laboratories, associations, activists or interviews with all types of public (adults, college students, high school students, students, detainees, victims of rape ...), we came to the realization that violence was present in all aspects of life, all the time, even where we did not see her and she was often responsible for many dysfunctions and sufferings in our intimacy and our relationships to others. We then launched the crazy project of trying to live a life without violence, starting with learning to identify and process it in real time.

We live in a paradoxical time, where the media and the dominant culture provide us with guidance and advice of all kinds to live a fulfilling sexuality. Under the guise of sexual liberation, empowerment or an endless quest for pleasure, sex has become a consumer product like any other. On the contrary, it seems to us that intimate space and sexuality should be considered as essential - and therefore precious - elements of our construction.

On the other hand, society as a whole continues to produce caricatural, discriminating, sexist, racist, classist and LGBTphobic discourses, which exclude any "outsize" individual and only serves to reinforce the dominant in their position of power. Faced with these contradictory injunctions, we manage as best we can, with what we have. Only, in a country where sex education is close to nothing, and where the only spaces to address these issues are steeped in stereotyped rhetoric, we realize that we have very few tools to build or rebuild an intimate which is ours.

If education appears to be one of the keys, it is also about educating us, adults, and to deconstruct integrated schemas since the youngest age, sometimes totally unconsciously. We are convinced that without this work, human relationships will continue to be based on patterns of domination and make violence one of the central ingredients of life, sexuality and all forms of interaction.

Two recent articles in The New York Times have caught our attention: Avital Ronell, queer * professor and feminist at New York University, accused of sexual harassment by a former gay student, Nimrod Reitman, and actress Asia Argento who allegedly paid 380 $ 1,000 to an actor who accused him of sexual assault while still a minor. The reception of these two articles reflects the way in which society is hardly able to accept that women, too, can produce violence in any form. So men would be able, but not women? Can we build an egalitarian world by being convinced that violence belongs to a genre?

We believe that any system that protects one group of people at the expense of another is an unequal system that must be combated: the system that protects men who commit sexual violence, as well as the system that protects women who perpetrate violence. sex